deep breath

 My sister said my MIL and I shouldn't be talking. She triggers me so much. Ever since I saw their relationship dynamic I was pretty much annoyed about the situation I put myself in. I knew then that I shouldn't be with person I am with. I am sharing a life with someone I wish to never see or talk to again. I am over it. I am moving on with my life. I no longer want to be a part of their family. There is a tinge of regret on my part for not being strong enough. When I left, why did I ever come back? Because I didn't have anyone. I was alone and I couldn't go through life alone. In a city with no family or friends. 

I'm a disappointed at myself for still allowing my situation to go on. I'm miserable here. That is a fact. When I was back home, I allowed myself to be free but I also dread each day that passes. It was getting close to our flight back. I wanted to stay there. Yeah there's a part of me who is feeling heartbroken about this. My kids needed to see their father and I completely understand what I had to do. 

Right now I'm not in my ideal situation but I'm giving myself grace for my own capacity at the moment. I only look forward to changing my mindset, my habits, how I take care of myself, how I prioritize myself. 

To all parts of me, I love you. We got this!